Nurturing Father-Child Relationships
Today’s lifestyles are changing. More fathers are effectively balancing their personal, work, and family times. Both children and fathers realize the importance of the father’s role. A father’s influence continues across the generations.
For years, researchers have concentrated on the mother’s role in the family. However, within the last 10 years, more researchers have studied the father’s role. Investigators say that the father’s role has a profound influence on the social, emotional, and intellectual development of his children.
The mother and father interact with children in unique and different ways. These roles are not equal or interchangeable, but each member of the family makes his or her own contribution to child development.
Paternal Impacts
The father’s role in society has changed during the last 20 years, with a trend towards acceptance of a nurturing father who is more involved in child care responsibilities. Fathers have an impact on their children from infancy through adulthood. Fathers who are more involved in infant caregiving have infants with greater cognitive development at 1 year than fathers who are less involved in infant caregiving. Infants can distinguish fathers from other adults early.
Fathers who are involved with their preschool children help foster their verbal ability and a sense of being in charge of their fate. For school-age children, fathers are a link to the outside world. Adolescents need firm guidance, followed by explanations and reasons.
Fathers continue to be involved in the lives of their children in an adult child and father relationship. At the birth of a grandchild, the father of an adult child becomes a grandfather and extends himself to another generation.
Father’s Influence
Researchers say fathers influence their children in the areas of self-esteem and school achievement. Those fathers who were more affectionate and spent time with their children contributed positively to the self-esteem of their children. Fathers who value education have children who do better in school than fathers who do not value education.
Characteristics of Good Fathers
Fathers have the opportunity to spend quality time with their children that may contribute happy memories to last a lifetime. While each father is a unique person who parents in his own style, there are some characteristics that good fathers have in common.
- Involvement: Good fathers are involved in the lives of their children. They attend their children’s school events, games, and activities. They also involve the children in their lives and the adult world, by taking them to see the workplace or taking them along when the car needs to be repaired.
- Support: Good fathers expect a great deal from children, but also accept and support the unique individuals their children are becoming. They acknowledge each child and are never ashamed of their children.
- Discipline: Good fathers set limits and are firm. They let their children know their beliefs and expectations but rely on explanations and reasoning rather than force.
- Time: Good fathers spend time with their children. They realize that their time with children is really an investment in them. Fathers are busy people, but rather than saying, “I don’t have time,” they might consider asking, “How much time will it take?” Many fathers of adult children reflect back to those days when the children were home and wish they had invested more time with their children.
